Oh Boy!! Can't believe it's been 3 weeks since I last checked into the blog world. Missed everyone…thanks for stopping by. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!
I went to Naija for nice long needed vacation and needless to say it's hell trying to get used to being back in the states. It doesn't help that the weather here has been crap. But we shall overcome.....sniff sniff sniff sniff.
So!! About my trip. Just before I left I declared my singledom with as much zealth and enthusiasm to insight a movement - okay I’m reaching there, but you get my point.No no no no...I’m not trying to retract anything I said, but I am going to interject and say life has a way of making you eat your words. I should have figured there's always a lesson lurking in the corner waiting to teach you to not think you are in complete control of everything that happens to you.
If you remember, there was a part of my declaration where I mentioned a Mr. L. Here's a little reminder if you don't remember..."There was only one person after true love I could have seen something with, but there was still something missing. Or maybe it was me missing something? I still have to keep my eye on him - I like to call him Mr. L."
Yes him - he made a very special appearance this trip, but before I spill the beans I’d just like to state, that I had no intentions of rekindling any romance, flame, escapade, rendezvous with anybody past or present. I was simply going to have fun - just like the next person. Naija or shall I say "Lagos" has a lot of suitable young men - at least enough to keep you distracted during your stay, but I for one never expect much as a general rule of thumb. High expectations never live up to the hype. I am a play it by ear, live by the moment kind of chic. If it happens, good! If not, good!
So, on the first day I got into Lagos I ran into Mr. L at a mutual friend’s party. We kept in touch over the year, but about 3 months before my trip I faded into the background. My Singledom made me want to disconnect with male connections I wasn't sure of. He had always been great to me – kind, sweet, mischievous, cheeky, rude and fun. We truly were good friends, but for some reason there was a lot going on when we starting talking so I chucked it up to bad timing and let it be.
The thing is that we could never deny that “something” was there. As a result, it was much easier for us to be the kings of our worlds when we were apart, because I’m sure on a subconscious level we both knew “that thing” would bring us back together – even if it was just a really great friendship.
Needless to say Mr. L had no idea I would be in town so it was lovely seeing his expression when I tapped him on the shoulder. He didn't quite scream (but it sounded close enough), then he picked me up while hugging and spinning me around at the same time – the boy’s got talent. Everyone was looking at our strange and lovely reunion. As soon as he put me down he held my shoulders and pushed me back a little and said "why didn't you tell me you were coming?" Do I tell him "you confuse the shit outta me and I’m not sure about how to classify our friendship or relationship?” Of course I didn't tell him that - I simply smiled and said "I'm here now. What difference does it make?" He looked slightly hurt, but smiled and said "So it's like that ehn!! Not cool, but it's great to see you again." We hung out through out the party catching up like old times, and almost immediately we fell back into place. It was a good night.
I expected nothing even after such a nice night, because I know how people can be. You'll leave that night swearing up and down you'll call and hang out but it'll never happen. He could bloody well have been there with a date or girlfriend. What the hell did I know then? If you haven't noticed I can be a tad bit pessimistic.
Surprisingly though from that day till the day I left Mr. L and I saw and hung out almost everyday. It wasn't planned, but he made his presence known and felt. We went everywhere together - we even joked about how his ladies would be pissed that he's ignored them all Christmas because I unexpectedly appeared. Before anyone misinterprets this "He is single, but I won't assume for one second he chills in Naija waiting for anyone to just drop in. He's an attractive guy - I’d be somewhat weary if he didn't have some play dates." It’s the same way I would hope he doesn’t just pop up where I live. He might catch me on a good day or a bad day. Fortunately, it was a good day for him…hehehe!!
It's a hard story to sum up into a few paragraphs, but the gist of my trip is that I went feeling empowered by my declaration of independence and even though nothing has changed, I was pleasantly surprised by the attention I received from a person who I tried my best to write off. I don't know what's going to happen because I’m so set in my bloody ways it's hard for me to shake off the mindset I’ve acquired over the years. My rules stand as is: No long-distance, no Naija boyfriend (too many horror stories), but as I say that I know there are enough decent Naija guys living in and away from Naija, so I won't generalize and make it an excuse.
I am even more messed up and confused than ever….2007 is proving to be exciting to say the least; but this time around I’m hoping nature really just does its damn thing. It’s not fair that we have to figure this all out by ourselves.
I'll fill you in on what happens, but for now I’m back and still SINGLEEEEEE!!!